once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
