Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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