Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
