Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
