Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just cut my nipple shaving
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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