If that was your dad, he is hot
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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