just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
