Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
