Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
