yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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