Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
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