the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I need to sanitize my soul.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
