my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
All the doctor said was why
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
