your thong is hanging out like whoa
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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