I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
