You can't special order awesome
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
