You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
