No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
