fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
As shirtless as possible
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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