Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
