I can tuck mytits in my pants
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Randomize
