i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Randomize
