I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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