Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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