It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
