Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Small penises have feelings too.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
