He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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