I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
