Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We have so much sex to catch up on
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
