Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
