It's Friday. Sex?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
