i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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