So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
