i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
