I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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