The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I love having hate sex.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
