Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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