is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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