Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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