I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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