i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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