I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
