We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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