Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
