I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
