Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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