Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
