Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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