Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
