It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
